28.11.24
I haven’t had or probably more accurate to say I haven’t made any time to write for ages. I have spent a bit of time writing some posts in my head. I always find the titles fun to make up.
One of the posts I was planning to write towards the end of our time in Colombia would have been called The Cranberries. As in the band, after their song Disappointment. I bloody loved the Cranberries. I probably fancied Delores O’Riorden. Not that I’d have known that then. I was also disappointed when Delores O’Riorden had a sore throat and cancelled the concert at Wembley that I had tickets to. I was a lot more than disappointed when I heard Delores O’Riorden had been found drowned in the bath, not all that long ago.
The Cranberries because I was disappointed at how Colombia had turned out. After the epic chick adventure, we travelled a bit more, but in effect, although we did some properly cool stuff the emotional unrest and instability of travelling seemed to prevail over the kids, different ones at different times, but it seemed there was always one losing it, and not quietly or privately and it felt really hard.
Some of the cool stuff we did though: the kids learned to surf, we stayed in a rainforest in the north of Colombia in an area called Minca, where the birds were amazing. We met two parrots who had decided to make a home at the place we were staying. These weren’t just parrots. These were parrots with emotions. The prevailing emotion we saw was jealousy. The mother parrot was very possessive over the manager of the hotel. The child was possessive of its mother. We watched this play out when the parrot was sitting on the manager’s shoulder and anyone tried to get near her. We spent quite a lot of time, whilst it rained, which it did a lot – it’s a rainforest – , observing them.
We hiked through a Tayrona National Park, to a beaches, accessible only by hike or by boat. The park is home to some local indigenous tribes: Kogi, Wiwa, Arhuacos. The indigenous people are recognisable by their look, but also by their all white dress and leather accessories. We followed one girl, with a backpack type thing, with a baby in it. Within all these experiences, there were pockets of wonder and joy. But kids struggled. They weren’t interested in doing much at all. More or less, mas o minus, the only thing that they wanted was to watch. They managed to scrape up some enthusiasm for learning to surf, but that was about it. Hence The Cranberries and Disappointment. I had thought that once they were out of the school they hated, they would be happier, or at least a bit more content. Turns out I was wrong! C’est la vie. Turns out that stability and routine is more coveted than travelling to the mind of kids. I guess I could have realised this from their reaction to covid. They lived their best lives, cooped up at home, with only us and the garden for company. This level of distress from the kids was very unexpected. We did our best to hold and contain them etc but it was with extreme effort.
Anyway, here we are on Take Two, in Pucon, Chile. So far away from the UK. Almost as far south of the equator (39 degrees) as London is North (51degrees). Where we were in Colombia, Chinchina, is 4 degrees north of the equator. The point is, it is very far away, but this place is much more familiar. Pucon is an adventure town. It swells by 100,000 people in the high season, winter and summer. Winter to ski on the volcano, summer to raft the rivers, climb, swim in the lakes etc. It is beautiful here. Green, snow capped volcano, hilly. It is springtime, so the flowers are coming out. It is quite/very chilly in the mornings. This is challenging as where we are staying is uninsulated, but offset by the beauty of the surroundings. When the sun is out, which is increasing in frequency, it is warm. The weather is a bit reminiscent of British weather in it’s unpredictability, it’s rain and it’s cloudiness. It’s also reminiscent of its long spring days. Current sunset is around 9pm and we are still a month away from solstice.
I am currently sat in a cafe and I can hear English being spoken. I didn’t hear one word of English in Chinchina, Colombia. We have walked into a fairly ready made community. We ended up here through Tali. Tali has an old university friend who moved to Chile for a year, eleven years ago. We have been here for three weeks now – with zero intention of making it more than six months, fear not, we have promised the kids, no sneaky extensions. The kids have been in school for two weeks. We found places in a Montessori school where most of the teachers speak English, at least a bit. The school day is a normal length of time, not the 9 hour day of their previous school and they are all doing fairly well there, I think. They are however, bearing the scars/yet to heal wounds, of their time in Colombia. They all really (really, really) want to go home. The younger two are mellowing a little with time and with the freedom of where we are living. They get out the car when we drive through the gate, after school, go to a neighbours trampoline and we don’t see them till dinner. This is the dream. But the older one is not mellowing in the same way. I had hoped to get this year in before the hormonal changes of adolescence took hold of her. I clearly missed that boat.
I am asking myself regularly who this trip is really for. Me of course. Like the old lady who swallowed a fly, all the way up to the horse. Me, of course. Unlike her the old lady who swallowed the fly, I’m very much alive.
There are some unbelievable things this trip has given us, but I hadn’t taken into consideration the emotional toll it would have on some or all of the kids. Hadn’t taken into consideration how different their needs are. Maybe ‘hadn’t taken into consideration’ is the wrong turn of phrase. Maybe I had just totally misunderstood, or underestimated their needs. My dream of them learning spanish, or my aim of them learning spanish, whilst not dashed, is far more difficult than I expected. Yet we have the opportunity to live in a place, by a river, surrounded by trees and the possibility of kayaking and swimming daily in the summer. We can get chickens again – my dream – I’m not going to smuggle them. I’ve already found a place where my imaginary chickens can live and stay after we’ve gone. I/we are trying to weigh up if giving the kids this experience or outdoor freedom is enough.
Watch this space!